Mike Plante! WTF?

As a producer, sometimes it is of the utmost importance to master the skill of the hard sell.  Especially when dealing with talent.  While it would appear I have failed in the case of Nora, I still remain confident that her management and agency will allow her the personal agency to make the appropriate decision.

My more realistic and immediate concern is the refusal of my friend, Mike Plante.

Mike is an old friend of mine.  We've seen many cities together at many times, and romped together through many an awkward terrain.  While he appears to appear like a corporate stooge in the above picture, you'll see that his athletic prowess and sense of victory rivals mine, as pictured below, making him today's best candidate to Be An Actor!  Sweet!

As is readily apparent his grit and determination rivals only Spartacus.  And it is for those qualities that Frankie sculpted the perfect role for our moustached wingman.  And yet, over the last six months, he, like Nora, has rejected every overture for a tailor made project that will propel his star meter to the heavens that house his bowling score.  What the fuck gives?

Please, fellow readers, facebook or email me and I'll provide his details so you can harass him into the film.

I Would Make a Sweet Boyfriend!

I've taken my first day off in two weeks.  I spent the day soul searching on the beach, playing in the waves, and existentially questioning my very existence.  Wow!  Not really your typical day off!

In NYC, it is my habit to wash away these ruminations at the Ear Inn or Pao.  But here in Santa Marta, the only "local" I can really imagine is the strip joint down the road, The Pink Flamingo, and I can't really in good faith, health, or conscience  qualify it as such, despite its many diverse offerings.

In any event, the lack of work time has led to some pretty fucking serious self-examinations--thanks to Chris Smith, I'm comfortable being a reality show.  To the point, it was somewhere between my second tussle with the playful ocean, an pleasant afternoon nap in the shade, and a scolding by Eva in Paris that I realized something--I would make a sweet boyfriend.

Here are the main reasons why:

(1) I'm on production frequently so you wouldn't have to see me and thus wouldn't get annoyed by me.  Getting annoyed with your partner can really be a thorn in the side of a healthy relationship.

(2) If you need your space you can always send me to the bar.  They know me there.

(3) I more than likely wouldn't stray as I'm certainly not getting any younger.

(4) I have gray hair which points, at least in a superficial way, to me being mature.

(5) Assuming you have a mother I can entertain her with stories from weird places.

(6) I live in an apartment.  Right now though I'm living in a house that feels, again, like The Real World.  So if you enjoy reality television, you'd essentially be dating a cast member!  How sweet is that!

(7) If you're insecure about eating, I will finish your cheeseburger for you.

So ladies, be you single or taken, chew on this for a minute or two and get back to me.  If you have referrals please email them to me with pictures (both head shots and full body shots--think casting).  If you can think of more reasons why I would make a sweet boyfriend, please send them to me and I'll weed through them.

Until tomorrow...

A Week in Photos

Locations Meeting

Frankie Versus The Couch

Me in Repose

6AM - Backyard of our Finca

Jack Befriends the Enemy (aka Glasses Killa)

and finally the obligatory weekly installment of our shirtless driver, Manuel

The New Finca: A New Dog, Broken Glasses, Sex Shops, and Rekindled Friendships

Readers.

I am appalled at myself for the delay in communique but work has domineered more of my leisure than it previously had.  That apology aside, let's not shit around and proceed wildly, henceforth:

(1) We've changed location to a finca on the water that has a dog.  While I like the dog a tremendous amount, on the first day whilst at work, he took advantage of my glasses and destroyed them.  Below you'll see Jack's failed attempt to put them back together.  Said dog in question also has fleas, which may or may not aiding Jack's hair to appear so peculiarly.

(2) While I typed away at the office and squinted through contracts, Frankie continued his scout with the team.  Today took him to the police station, where he modeled the following "extras."  Pictures forthcoming.

(3) It's been really amazing to reunite with my Canadian producer friend Ken.  He and I used to play squash in Cuba and partly inspired me to (try to) produce.  Last night we ate street food and drank tequila in plastic chairs on the beach.

(4) We've located the only adult toy store in Santa Marta.  Just saying.....

Hasta manana.