As Nora taunts by sending me "accidental" emails of her exploits in Venice, I'm happy to report that Jack and our new friend Ana conspired to prepare the most "mejor" Thanksgiving dinner, augmenting all with bacon! What an idea! Following an accomplished effort at teaching the house dog how to swim, Frankie had the foresight to Entertain us with Human Centipede! If you have seen it, it's a crowd pleaser! If you haven't, I'm not entirely sure where to begin.
Because we're thoroughly in the "in" in New York with regards to those who are in the "in" in the very important world of independent film which Ted Nope so eloquently and accurately documents, we know the folks behind the release, and we, the collective in Colombia, have transcribed the following public letter to the man behind the Centipede (luckily not in the middle, if you know what I'm saying), Ryan Werner.
11/26/2010
Dear Ryan,
Thanks in advance for effectively publicizing your film, HUMAN CENTIPEDE. As we browsed the selection of bootlegs at the local Super Market, it immediately caught our eye.
While we held off for a week to view, we did find time to screen it towards the end of our Colombian Thanksgiving. It certainly made me appreciate how good it is to be an American. I'm quite excited for the betterment of humanity in that you're so eager to involve yourself with the sequel. I think the whole world, including children, will most certainly benefit from such a work of art. It stands in line with other works in your catalog. To quote Mark Borchardt in MODUS OPERANDI, "Job Well Done!".
Like the best of cinema, its intrinsic social value was demonstrated by its altruistic nature which far exceeds the reaches of our living room. Without pause I can say it really instilled solid values in Andres, our eight year old neighbor, particularly when the antagonist allowed the woman to be fed. I mean, despite his apparent deviant nature, what a Nice Guy!
You, as a curator, have reached deity status in my book, and Godard would be proud, if He by some odd chance remains unaware of your promotion of such a piece, and its availability in a town as remote and small as Santa Marta.
To say independent cinema can't change the world is simply false!
Firm handshakes, sturdy pats on the back, and lemondrops for all,
Nicholas Shumaker
dictated and then written
CC: Mike Plante, Elizabeth Nastro, Jack Turner, 8 year old Andres from across the street
